Sunday, June 21, 2015

Sexuality - What is yours?


Yea this blog has touched this before but with new readers some subjects are worth revisiting. Sometimes a good reminder does not hurt as well to center us on basic matters.

For most people, when it comes to sexuality, there are two options: gay or straight. As a matter of fact, for some, the only sexuality that matters is heterosexuality (straight), and everything else is deviating from what is right and natural.

While this seems to be the opinion of many persons, the fact is sexuality, like most human behaviour, is not so simple. As varied as other aspects of humanity are - race, height, weight, beliefs - so is sexuality.


Take a look at the Kinsey Scale, for example. Developed by Alfred Kinsey - sexologist and founder of the Kinsey Institute - this homosexual to heterosexual rating scale was designed in 1948 to represent a study done by Kinsey and his associates to demonstrate that people do not fit neatly into sexual categories.

Kinsey writes in Sexual Behaviour in Human Male, "Males do not represent two discrete populations, heterosexual and homosexual. The world is not to be divided into sheep and goats. The living world is a continuum in each and every one of its aspects."

In Sexual Behaviour in Human Female he wrote: "It is a characteristic of the human mind that tries to dichotomise in its classification of phenomena. Sexual behaviour is either normal or abnormal, socially acceptable or unacceptable, heterosexual or homosexual; and many persons do not want to believe that there are gradations in these matters from one to the other extreme."

So let us examine the spectrum:



Asexual - This is someone who has no sexual desire or interest. Being asexual is different from having a low libido or being celibate. It's an absence of a sexual orientation. Some asexuals still engage in sexual relationships despite their lack of desire because they want to be parents, and it makes it easier for them to fit into society. An example of an asexual character is Sheldon Cooper from television show The Big Bang Theory.

Homosexual - This person has a sexual desire and interest with someone of the same gender. Female homosexuals are called lesbians, and they are generally more accepted in society than male homosexuals. In the past, homosexuality was considered a mental defect; however, it is now more accepted as a form of sexual orientation. Many countries have laws prohibiting homosexuality, and others have been changing those laws, even allowing gay marriage.

Bisexual - This person is sexually attracted to both males and females. They can enjoy sexual contact with both genders; however, most of them choose one to commit to. Sometimes, bisexuals end up in long-term heterosexual relationships and, therefore, they are assumed to be heterosexual.

Heterosexual -This is the most accepted form of sexuality and is considered the 'natural' human relationship, since reproduction requires a male and a female. Most religions state that heterosexuality is the only way, as far as 'god' is concerned. Heterosexuals have no desire or sexual interest in persons of the same gender at all.

Pansexual - Also called omnisexual. a person who is pansexual does not determine their sexual desire or interest based on gender. They are interested in the individual first, so their attraction is not influenced at all by vagina or penis. Pansexuals refer to themselves as being 'gender blind', stating that gender is irrelevant when determining whether they will be sexually attracted to others.

unclear sexuality

It is clear that sexuality is not as clear-cut as we may want it to be, and human beings are still figuring out their individual paths. However you identify sexually, be true to who you are first. I know that society is very clear about what is acceptable, but the beautiful thing is all that is changing. It is more important to be honest about who you are than pretend to be something you are not in order to fit in.

Sexuality is a part of who we are, and it can really improve our quality of life if we know how to tap into the optimum benefit of being completely sexually satisfied. It is a fact that persons who are sexually satisfied are healthier and happier than those who are not. Have fun and stay sexy!

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Send your questions or comments to sexychatwithshelly@gmail.com or Tweet me @drsexylive or Facebook www.facebook.com/allaboutthesexy

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