Monday, October 29, 2012

Lasting Lesbian Relationships

 Frequently, I am asked, "Why do lesbian relationships seem to not last longer than 3 years?" I am not certain that is necessarily true. Long-term lesbian relationships often go unnoticed because they are not involved in community drama! They maintain normal, balanced lives that emanate stability.

Sure, there are lesbians who enter relationships with "exit plans"; they are prepared for things to not work out. The relationship's demise may be attributed to ignorance about how-to live as a couple. For instance, they do not have joint plans or ownership about anything. They maintain inventory of who owns what: furniture, kitchen stuff, lawnmower, grill, office desk, bedding, etc. They do not plan their lives together; they do not grow together; they do not dream together.

The length of a relationship does not always mean it is happily successful. Some couples stay together because they fear the unknown of separation more than they dread staying together. However, for those lesbian couples who are blessed with happy relationships, have highlighted key elements that contribute to their success:

Lots of love - Keep the passion alive
Compatibility on key issues - Politics, religion, kids, purchases, money
Communication - Listen and try to understand
Remember the Small Things - Show that you pay attention to details and to what is important
Trust - Have no secrets and be transparent
Respect - Appreciate each other and have an equal partnership
Consideration - Put her first in your world

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